And if we all go back to another time...
I can´t help it, I have to write what follows: While I sit here by myself, all lost and lonely, I can´t think of nothing else: if only...
Yesterday was a shitty day... for real, I think it was one of the hardest day of my life. It was my first day after my grilfriend broke up with me... and all I wanted was to have a nice day, I wanted people to pampered me and just to have a peaceful time, relax and think things over, but no!!! oh no! It was too much... imposible I'd say.
I got up really early in the morning to go help in my school and I was busy all day... that wasn't so bad, I mean, I didn't have the change to think and torture myself with my thoughts 'coz I was too busy for that.
Later on, when I got to my house I found myself in a battle field, worse that guns and swords... a family battle field. Apparently my parents had a discussion with my brother about his life (believe me guys... be patient, I'll tell more about this later, let's not get into details) and suddenly I was involve as a mediator or a judge o_O ... In my fucking day of mourning I had to be mature enough, centered enough to had an argument with my folks... I mean... why!?
To make this story short... my mom cracked up, my dad almost cracked up and I was so shocked that, for one moment, I forgot what was going on in my life! It was one of the worst family arguments that we've had... and oh!!! let my tell you this: my bro wasn't around, so I was left alone with my parents, arguing about stupid things, trying to defend my brother, trying to get a hold of myself and connect with my parents and I felt just to lonely.
Usually after this kind of things I´d just call Ireri... obviously, that was not an option.
Right there, in those moments I think I experienced true loneliness... after a few minutes, my bro arrived and Quique, him and I had the chance to talk... that helped... and later I could talk with pancho... that helped A LOT!
That night I close my eyes listening to Sigur Ross (or however you spell it) wishing that I was trapped in the middle of a nightmare, wishing to wake up in the morning brand new, with my life as it was just a few days ago, waking up from this...
Today I woke up and found myself here, in this realm of reality, nothing changed... I wonder, could there be another Victor, maybe on the other side of the mirror, a happier one? And if there is one, why am I here? Why can´t be in some other realm? Why can't I be in the other side of the mirror?... Maybe, juts maybe, things are different over there.
PS: fucking Belle and Sebastian "If you are felling sinester" cd. I remembered that the night Ireri pushed me away I was hearing that cd. The night my bro crashed he was listening to that same cd, and the day I crashed I was listening to that very same cd.
Yesterday was a shitty day... for real, I think it was one of the hardest day of my life. It was my first day after my grilfriend broke up with me... and all I wanted was to have a nice day, I wanted people to pampered me and just to have a peaceful time, relax and think things over, but no!!! oh no! It was too much... imposible I'd say.
I got up really early in the morning to go help in my school and I was busy all day... that wasn't so bad, I mean, I didn't have the change to think and torture myself with my thoughts 'coz I was too busy for that.
Later on, when I got to my house I found myself in a battle field, worse that guns and swords... a family battle field. Apparently my parents had a discussion with my brother about his life (believe me guys... be patient, I'll tell more about this later, let's not get into details) and suddenly I was involve as a mediator or a judge o_O ... In my fucking day of mourning I had to be mature enough, centered enough to had an argument with my folks... I mean... why!?
To make this story short... my mom cracked up, my dad almost cracked up and I was so shocked that, for one moment, I forgot what was going on in my life! It was one of the worst family arguments that we've had... and oh!!! let my tell you this: my bro wasn't around, so I was left alone with my parents, arguing about stupid things, trying to defend my brother, trying to get a hold of myself and connect with my parents and I felt just to lonely.
Usually after this kind of things I´d just call Ireri... obviously, that was not an option.
Right there, in those moments I think I experienced true loneliness... after a few minutes, my bro arrived and Quique, him and I had the chance to talk... that helped... and later I could talk with pancho... that helped A LOT!
That night I close my eyes listening to Sigur Ross (or however you spell it) wishing that I was trapped in the middle of a nightmare, wishing to wake up in the morning brand new, with my life as it was just a few days ago, waking up from this...
Today I woke up and found myself here, in this realm of reality, nothing changed... I wonder, could there be another Victor, maybe on the other side of the mirror, a happier one? And if there is one, why am I here? Why can´t be in some other realm? Why can't I be in the other side of the mirror?... Maybe, juts maybe, things are different over there.
PS: fucking Belle and Sebastian "If you are felling sinester" cd. I remembered that the night Ireri pushed me away I was hearing that cd. The night my bro crashed he was listening to that same cd, and the day I crashed I was listening to that very same cd.
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